Why This Book?

Reason #1: IDENTIFY
Anyone who has ever found themselves repeating dysfunctional patterns that has cause problems in their life and relationships, and then wonder "Why do I do that?" or "Why am I like this?" is likely to experiencing habitual subconscious programming that has been referred to as Adult-Child Syndrome. Thawing Adult/Child Syndrome is geared toward surfacing the underlying patterns of behavior and limiting beliefs that keep us stuck in unproductive relationships, the original wounds of abandonment, shame, and contempt, and how our subconscious mind adapted to the unique circumstances of our childhood by creating survival skills that now interfere with healthy coping. Awareness is 60% of change - action is the other 40%. Take action today; read this book and identify the origins of your relationship problems.
Reason #2: INTERRUPT
Healthy relationships consist of stable, effective, and authentic patterns of interaction that must be learned. These were not fully modeled if you grew up with wounded parents - wounded people, wound people. Thawing Adult-Child Syndrome focuses in on the "here-and-now" symptoms of dysfunction in our adult life and relationships. This insight-oriented program helps bring one's "Inner Family of Self" & "Life Script" to the surface so that appropriate changes can be made. Learn about your personal set of roles, rules, and drivers that cause so much discord. Once you have identified how these ineffective relationship cycles and patterns play out in your case, you can learn ways to interrupt them long enough to insert new, flexible, and resourceful choices that will bring stability and authentic intimacy into your life.
Reason #3: INTERVENE
Identification and interruption of dysfunctional patterns opens up space to insert something new. It is critical that you establish a good understanding of your own inner landscape in order to develop plans and goals for where and how to focus your changes. Thawing Adult-Child Syndrome offers tools and interventions geared toward healing the relationship with self, which is based upon the idea that "One cannot have a healthy relationship with others until they first develop a healthy relationship with themselves." NOTE: It is very important to develop what I call a "safe container" in which to do this work because, like any other healing process, there is pain involved with treatment or intervention of any kind. A safe container may consist of supportive friends & family, a 12-step group, a church group, a therapist, etc.
Reason #4: INITIATE
We all just instinctively know that healing is a journey, even when we entertain fantasies about changes taking place overnight. At first it gets worse before it gets better, but it does get better. Reading and completing the exercises in Thawing Adult-Child Syndrome is an excellent way to begin your journey! Once you develop and implement effective interventions designed to replace the roles, rules, and drivers of your personal dysfunction you will be well on your way. You can give up relationship mind games and engage in authentic intimacy. There is further help when you are ready in the remaining books in the Thawing the Iceberg Series: Thaw - Freedom from Frozen Feelings, Thawing Childhood Abandonment Issues, and Thawing Toxic Relationships. (click on the links to explore these titles)

Summary of Contents

Testimonials & Reviews

I'm about a quarter of the way into the book and already with the first two exercises I've gained great insight into myself. I can see where this is going in a lot of aspects and am unsure what the next step is at the same time I know it's a step forward. This in my opinion is a great read for parents, people trying to better themselves,or people trying to escape/break unhealthy habits; i.e., chemical dependencies, harmful relationships, gambling, or any number of things we throw ourselves into to escape our problems.

- Portia James-McKnight

Why do we act the way we do? Read the Thaw series and find out. It's more than a "get in touch with your inner child" set of books. The books are a great, non-threatening way to understand yourself and pick away at unwanted emotional baggage. A great bargain! It's not easy to delve into painful past memories. Even those of us with fairly mild and remembered happy, healthy upbringing will be able to reach inside to uncover--not make up, but peel away--layers of learned behavior we've developed to protect ourselves from emotional pain inflicted by others.

- Lisa J. Lickel

This book and the www.internet-of-the-mind.com website helped me to understand and deal with relationship problems,addictive behavior and anxiety.These behavior patterns were rooted in being raised in an ineffective family unit. The excellence of Don Carter's books lies in practical step-by-step uncovering of problems of the past. He includes audio and internet materials to provide a great healing package. The audio materials [Sold separately - Click Here] include relaxation techniques and visualization, which are so important to "still and quiet the soul" so that "renewing of the mind" can take place.

- Graham W.

...As a therapist and coach who uses transactional analysis with my own clients, I'm always glad to see books written for the general public that apply this particular way of understanding human behavior and interactions... Simple diagrams illustrate the concepts to help the reader grasp Carter's theory. Self-exploratory questions engage the reader in a process of dissecting personal scabs, infections, and wounds, detecting ego states, and identifying motivating triggers for ineffective behaviors.

-Deah Curry, Ph.D

About the Author

Don Carter, MSW, LCSW has been a therapist for nearly thirty years throughout which time he has been used at several mental wellness firms around Mid-Missouri. He has held positions from entry level to supervisor of a chemical dependency program at a large hospital. His main specialty areas include addictions, codependency, mood disorders, PTSD, and Adult/Child Syndrome.
The middle of 7 children, Don grew up on a farm with hard-working parents who had their own issues from youth. The farm work lead to a scholarship to play football at the University of Missouri at Columbia in 1977-79. He followed that with a brief stint with the New Orleans Saints in 1980. That experience was interrupted by a developing problem with alcohol and drugs. A series of childhood tragedies and bouts with addictions lead Don to his first encounter with the mental wellness system when he entered an inpatient therapy program at 29 years of age.
Don found treatment and recovery such an exceptionally gratifying experience that he went back to school, finished 2 degrees, ended up being a licensed therapist who devoted himself to helping others find their way out too. The Iceberg Model in his bestselling "Thawing the Iceberg Series" was a product of the years that followed. Don connects much of the success of that series to his relationship with God. "I truly feel I am living the strategy He has for my life and carrying a message He desires me to carry."

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